What's your common denominator?

Elementary eduation teaches us about fractions in arithmetic. Either adding or subtracting fractions requires that a common denominator is found before proceeding to the next step.

So it is with people whether you are adding someone into your life or subtracting someone from your life. It does not take a rocket scientist to figure out that I am speaking of relationships between men and women. (Naw, I am not speaking specifically of myself. Althought it applies to anyone.)

I have listened to many a story about the breakups or unions in black relationships. If I have not listened to it, I have read a novel concerning it. For the types of persons who have been in and out of relationships over and over and over and over and over, please evaluate each relationship for the common denominator. Don't look behind you. Don't look neither to the left, nor the right. Find a mirror and look at your pretty face, Honey! Its you Babygirl! Its you Babyboy! For each relationship (and I use that very loosely since we are in age of sexual openess) that ended, was it that persons fault? Seriously! What do you believe? Are you sure about that?

It does not have to be a relatinoship. It could be a set of failed business relationships. It could be a series of jobs you've had. What is the common denominator in all cases? Answer: Y-O-U! Pastor Kirbyjon Hines Caldwell loves to tell us that the definition of insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over and over, yet getting the same result. While I will not call anyone insane, I will say this: Be HONEST with yourself!

If you attract friends who always lean on you for money, yet you hate hearing their sad story, find out what kind of vibe you put out that attracts that kind of person. Is it your desire to help another? Is it because you don't want to disappoint another?

For men who attract women who seemingly go after your money, is it because you're flashing it in their face and that is the first thing they see? Sometimes successful women meet men who may be intimidated by their fame, fortune or success. If that is you, what vibe are you putting out there to attract that person? For that Christian Gal who attracts men who are interested in her body only, but she can not figure out why since she met him in church....Honey, it could be that tight sweater that shows off the curves in your upper body or it may be that low cut dress that draws his eyes to all your ample goodness!

Its real simple people. Ask a fisherman what kind of bait he uses to catch catfish. Then ask him what kind of bait he uses to catch Gar fish. In fact, the good folks at Hobby and Lifestyle http://www.hobbyand lifestyle.com state it best "There are hundreds of different types of fishing bait you can use depending on what time of year or season you're fishing in, what environment you are in (streams, rivers, ponds or deep ocean) and many other variables."


The only thing you can do is change you. Change so that you attract what you really want. If your desire is to meet a kind person, be kind. If your desire is to meet and mingle with business professionsls, place yourself in the right environment to do that. Don't sit there complaining about the other folks, make different choices. Marinate on that!

Friendly Priorities

Friendships are precious and when genuine, can be enjoyed a lifetime. I have several like that. The best kinds of friendships are the transparent, honest, loving, and it should enhance your life. YOU should also enhance your friends life as well. No person is perfect, so never expect perfection unless your friend is Jesus Christ!

Your friends should be the kinds of persons who can tell you about yourself and you listen. It kind of reminds me of President Obama and his wife Michelle and his dear friends. He once said they keep him grounded or tell him the truth when he has a totally off the wall idea. Yet they push him forward if he has a great idea. I suspect he would do the same for them.

Therefore, I thank you God for all of my Dear Friends. I thank you for those who counsel me. I thank you for those who love me. I thank you for those who respect my time. I thank you for those who have prayed with me, cried with me, and rejoiced with me.

I have very recently read this quote, "never make someone a priority when you are only an option to them"...I would suspect it is true. Personally, I can only be what I am at the core, and that is caring, loving, passionate, and true. If my heart is in it, it shows. Most of all I am understanding. Why? There is a time, a reason, and a season for everything. That which does not suit me, I address it. I try to work it out. I can say over the years I have gone though. I am 39, and I am not out for no Bull Mess. I now speak up for myself and get any foolishness straight.


I thank God for my journey, and I would not trade it in for anything. I have learned much a long the way. And yes, I have released a few friends a long the way. Their season with me had ended. It was just a matter of God had helped them finish their work in my life. Even if it has ended, I still love them and thank them for being what God wanted them to be.

Sincerely,

Kema Lazette

Claiming What's Mine in '09

The title of this blog is actually words I saw on a bumper sticker while driving in traffic to my church tonight. It resonated with me because there are some things on my list that I need to claim, make a plan for, and put it into action. Aside from growth in my relationship with the Father, my health needs to be put in check. This is something that can be done by me with prayer. Since I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, why have I not put this into perpetual motion? Good question! Procastination comes to mind. Fear of failure comes to mind. Comfort zone comes to mind. Procrastination and fear are hope-haters! Yes they are! These types of dispositions hinder progress and destroy dreams and goals. No more shall I succumb to procrastination and fear. Doubt can be put to rest too! Why put it out here for all the world to see? First, I have nothing to hide. Secondly, when you make yourself accountable, you tend to get things done. Keeping it to just yourself, lets you hide. Writing it down shall serve as motivation, inspiration and eventually turn into dedication. Hallelujah!


Joshua 23:14 "Now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the LORD your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed.

If NONE of God's good promises has failed, that means the promises to me will not fail. God has promised me health, wealth, fertility, and prosperity.

Tomorrow morning I shall awake early and go to the gym. I must walk and I must stretch and I must do some strength training. Gone are the days overindulging in processed foods. Gone are the days with NO control. Gone are the days of emotional eating! I welcome self-control into my life! Hallelujah! I welcome prayer about my eating and exercising. I welcome a purpose for my life. I welcome dedication! Thank you God! I spoke with a homegirl on Facebook tonight who had lost weight and says that 40 is the new 20! She said, "Kema, if I can do it, anybody can do it. Diet control, modification of desserts, and good ol' exercise". I believe that. Losing weight may be hard but NOTHING is too hard for my God. Therefore, it is NOT impossible to me. Hence, it is obtainable for you as well. She walks 5 miles a day, 5times a week. Braids are in my near future! (smile)

I will accomplish everything I set out to do.

Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.


Sincerely with a sense of renewed encouragement,

Kema Lazette

The Size of Your "want-to"

Dr. Allen from Windsor Village UMC taught about people wanting to do things but not accomplishing their desire. He easily explained that people do not accomplish their desire because their "want-to" is simply not big enough. When a person wants to do something, you can count it done. For example, when I want to eat, I do.

So I had to think about all things I have said I wanted to do. I want to lose weight and be healthy. I want to travel the world. I want to blog. I want to complete my MBA. I want to ... _____________(fill in the blank with anything you have wanted to do). For each item, I could come up with excuses as to why it is not yet accomplished. At first my excuses were reasons, but when I recalled that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Phillipians 4:13), there is no excuse. That affirmation from the Holy Bible removes all excuses and replaces all doubt with expectancy.

Sometimes I have allowed fear of the unknown to petrify my steps. God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love, of power and of a sound mind (II Timothy 1:7). Orville and Wilbur Wright did not let fear stop them from creating and building the first successful airplane.

Well now! What stands in between me and my goals? Answer: "just a few steps". Nothing worth having comes easily. It is indeed a process. I have yet to find where God said how long it will take. This behooves me to create a plan. Write the plan down. Start the process. Make long term goals. Write down the small steps between the beginning and the desired outcome. What's next? Start step one. Check it off the list. Then step two ... and so on.

You have to start somewhere.